Everyone start praying . . .
Jun. 23rd, 2012 11:02 pmRecital is tomorrow night. I didn't think I was going to be nervous because the performance a couple of weeks ago sort of broke the ice (and that was in front of a MUCH bigger crowd than tomorrow's will be). But I'm now at the stage where, even though I've been playing the song for months and know it backwards and forwards, it's all sounding like crap.
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Date: 2012-06-24 03:10 am (UTC)Stage fright sucks, but I find it helps to bear in mind that odds are, for at least one person in the audience, the whole program is always magical. An introduction to a new world, or the crowning catharsis to some intense emotion. Which makes it an awesome honor to enact it. I know you're well-prepared and that you will do a great job.
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Date: 2012-06-24 03:12 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 03:20 am (UTC)This is such a great point! I will never forget one Sunday when I was singing with my church's worship team. I don't recall all the specifics, but it was one of those times when I sounded terrible (at least in my own ears), my attitude was not right and I could not focus on God or what I was doing at all. I walked off that stage thinking, "God, forgive me for doing such a poor job today! I was supposed to be praising you and leading others to do the same, and all I was doing was going through the motions and inwardly grumbling about everything!"
After the service, one of the teenagers that I'd seen around but had never really met came up to me and told me how my voice was so soothing to her and how God had worked in her heart through the worship and specifically my singing.
It was remarkable. Though all the specifics are lost to me now because it's been so many years, that moment and that lesson is something I will always treasure.
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Date: 2012-06-24 03:46 am (UTC)I particularly love hearing this because I've never experienced it from that end. I'm always the moved, not the mover (itself a great privilege). Many a time a song in Mass is the medium through which I receive consciousness of inspiration, divine love, divine forgiveness, or new and deeper resolve. And I'm sure that frequently for the choir it is simply Sunday (and maybe they have a head cold).
But my first such experience was when I first saw a "real" play as a junior in high school. The Tempest. Our English teacher, who took us on the field trip, ripped apart the performance afterwards. This was actually almost painful to me, who had been transported with delight throughout the whole thing and who had dreamed of it all the night afterwards.
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Date: 2012-06-24 04:03 am (UTC)I am usually on the receiving end as well, but I've had those times when people have said things like that to me, and it just leaves me humbled to think I *somehow* had a part in affecting another person in that way.
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Date: 2012-06-24 05:35 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 09:13 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 06:03 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 06:04 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 06:05 pm (UTC)I also played for my teacher/music minister's retirement ceremony at the church, a few weeks ago.
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Date: 2012-06-24 06:35 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 07:49 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-24 07:50 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2012-06-25 03:30 am (UTC)