Need a good laugh?

[litlover12]

Here are two:

"SlushPile Hell: One grumpy agent, a sea of query fails, and other publishing nonsense." Writhing websites! Deer agent! Books dictated by angels! Wearing chinos in the spirit world! It's a good thing I was alone in the house last night, because this site had me laughing like a crazy person.

"The Hater's Guide to the Williams-Sonoma Catalog." (Some profanity.) Acorn twine holders! Hungarian grain sacks! Seventy-two-dollar biscuits! White-trash-monk fruitcakes! It's a good thing I was alone in the house this morning, because . . . well, you know.

Comments

[asoulinbliss.livejournal.com]

Loved the W-S piece. I wonder about those things all the time, and it always seems that the food is the most outrageously priced. (Although to be fair, I've picked out REALLY good gifts from the Pottery Barn clearance section twice in my life. So I can't make fun of those stores too much!)

[mosinging1986.livejournal.com]

"Writhing websites" - HA!


"My procreated writing style will give the readers two great stories for the price of one."

Um, what?

Probably my favorite so far:

"Hello, I am A Christian woman that recently has been lead by the Lord to write books for little childrens and teensagers. I beleive these are blessings from above and I am convinced the Lord will will lead me to the write agent/pupblisher/illustrator."

"I’m no theologian, but I wonder if the Lord should first lead you to a dictionary."

And we wonder why the world hates us. *g*

*****


Are these real letters? I wouldn't be surprised. People are lunatics.

[ever-maedhros.livejournal.com]

Are those actual query letters? If so . . . I suddenly feel a lot less afraid of the day I'll be sending queries myself. I nearly died laughing at some of those lines!